Tag: Ortug the Barbarian

  • Ortug On Wizards

    Ortug On Wizards

    Me Ortug. Today me talk ’bout wizzy-wizards. They wear pointy hats and wave hands to make magic happen. Me not understand all that, but it’s kinda like tricks!

    Wizzy-wizards use spells. Spells like potions, but with words and moves. They say stuff like “abra-cadabra” and boom, fireball! Me not good with words, so me stick to smashing.

    Wizzy-wizards read big books, full of weird marks. They learn spells from books. Me not much for reading, but me like looking at pictures.

    Some wizzy-wizards make things fly, like broomsticks or themselves. Me never flew, but sounds fun.

    Wizzy-wizards got different types. Some like fire, some ice, some talk to animals. Lots of choices, like berries in forest.

    They not tough like warriors, no armor or big axes. But their magic strong. Me once saw wizzy-wizard make whole room light up. Shiny!

    Wizzy-wizards need focus. If they lose focus, spells go poof! Me not have much focus either, me just hit things.

    Sometimes me wonder why wizzy-wizards not use swords. Swords simple, like me. But they like their magic stuff.

    Wizzy-wizards help in fights. They shoot lightning, freeze enemies. Me charge in, they stay back. Teamwork, like different berries in same basket.

    So, wizzy-wizards cool. They make magic, read big books, wear hats. Me like smashing, they like waving. Both good in own ways!

  • Ortug on Orcs

    Ortug on Orcs

    Me Ortug. Ortug want talk ’bout why me like to fight orcs. Orcs big and tough like me, so fighting fun!

    Orcs live wild, like freedom. Me also like freedom, so we understand each other. They strong, me strong. When us clash, big booms!

    Orcs got villages, not fancy like cities. Houses made of wood, like forts. Me like simple things. Orcs not like rules, just do what they want. Me respect that.

    Sometimes orcs raid places, take stuff. They not care much, like me not care ’bout fancy stuff. We both like simple life.

    But orc fights, oh boy! Me get heart pumping. Swing big axe, hear clash of weapons. Orcs fight hard, never back down. Me like challenge.

    Orcs also got chiefs, lead tribes. They tough, like me. When me beat orc chief, feel like top of mountain!

    Some say orcs bad, but me not sure. They just live different, fight different. Maybe if we talk more, understand each other. But for now, me enjoy good brawl.

    So, Ortug fight orcs ’cause they tough, love freedom, fight hard. Me not hate them, just like to see who stronger. Maybe one day, me and orc share meat and stories.

  • Ortug on Dragons

    Ortug on Dragons

    Me Ortug. Today Ortug talk ’bout big flying lizards – Dragons! Dragons scary and cool, like big mountains with wings.

    Dragons come in colors – red, blue, green, and more. Each color mean different things. Red one like fire, breath fire. Blue one like sky, fly fast. Green one sneaky, hide in forests.

    Dragons hoard stuff like shiny gold and gems. Ortug not get it, but shiny things make them happy. Me like food, they like shinies.

    Dragons got scales, tough like rocks. Hard to hit them. Some got horns, spikes. Me once tried to climb dragon, not smart idea.

    They got breath weapon, like special power. Fire, ice, lightning, even yucky stuff. Me saw dragon melt stuff with fire breath, very scary.

    Dragons live long, longer than Ortug. They seen many things. Some smart, some just smash. But all strong and mighty.

    People tell stories ’bout dragons, like scary bedtime tales. Knights go fight dragons, get fame. Dragons not all bad, just want own space.

    If meet dragon, be careful. Don’t poke or steal shinies. Maybe talk, if dragon nice. If not, run fast!

    So, remember: dragons big, scaly, fly high, hoard shiny, breathe fire. Ortug say, dragons are like mountains, but with wings and roar!

  • Ortug on Other character classes

    Ortug on Other character classes

    e Ortug. Me talk ’bout other RPG friends you play with. Not just smashers like me. There many kinds!

    1. Wizzy-wizard: Wizzy-wizards got pointy hats, cast spells. Boom and zap! They use books, not for reading, for magic. They make fire, freeze stuff. Me not get it, but it’s like magic show.
    2. Thieffy-thief: Thieffy-thiefs sneaky sneaks. They take shiny things from bad guys. Fast hands, no see them coming. Me wonder where my meat went.
    3. Healy-healer: Healy-healers nice pals. They make hurts go away. If me hurt, they pat me and say, “No hurt now!” Me like that.
    4. Arrow-shooter: Arrow-shooters use pointy sticks from far away. They say, “Pew pew!” and arrows fly. Good for poking dragons from safe spot.
    5. Talky-bard: Talky-bards tell stories, sing songs. They make friends happy or scared. They talk so much, sometimes me nap.
    6. Armor-wall: Armor-walls wear all metal. They say, “Hit me!” and not get hurt. Me think they crazy, but they stop bad hits for team.
    7. Nature-druid: Nature-druids like trees, animals. They talk to birds, turn into bears. Me once saw one become squirrel, funny times.
    8. Booky-cleric: Booky-clerics pray for help. They heal and bless. Me not good with gods, but they strong friends.
    9. Punchy-monk: Punchy-monks use fists. They punch fast, kick hard. Me once arm wrestled monk, lost big time.
    10. Mystic-sorcerer: Mystic-sorcerers born with magic. They shoot lightning, change shapes. Magic in blood, like fire in belly.

    Me like all friends, even if me not get their things. Each one help team, like pieces of big puzzle. So, choose friend who fits, go on quests. RPG games full of cool pals!

    Regenerate

  • Ortug the Barbarian on Weapons

    Ortug the Barbarian on Weapons


    Me like hit things. Big sword, good for hitting. Today talk about swords and axes and things to hit with in game with dragons and dungeons, D&D they say.

    First, big sword. Big sword go smash! It’s called greatsword. You hold with both hands. Swing, smash, enemies go down. Big numbers on dice mean big smash. Me like big numbers.

    Ortug the Barbarian on Weapons

    Then, axe. Axe chop-chop! Battleaxe make heads roll. Me like how it sounds. Sometimes, axe has sharp side and flat side. Sharp side for chop, flat side for bam! Variety is good.

    Club, simple like me. Find stick, hit bad guys. It’s like tree high-five. Club not fancy, but it gets job done. Me not need fancy, me strong.

    Spear long stick with pointy end. Poke from far. Reach enemies before they reach me. Keep distance, no squish like bug.

    Hammer, like big nail hitter. Smash armor, smash bones. If enemy hide behind metal, me bring hammer. No hiding.

    Bow and arrow, pointy shooty. Me not good with these, need aim like elf. But if me get lucky shot, enemies surprised.

    Dagger small knife, sneaky-stabby. Me not sneaky, but dagger help when someone get too close. Quick like rat bite.

    Me hope this help you pick weapon in D&D. Remember, big sword smash, axe chop-chop, club bam, spear poke, hammer smash, bow shooty, dagger stabby. Choose what feel right for you, like favorite food. Now go hit things and have fun in dungeon place!